WALTER HILTON, OSA, AUGUSTINE BAKER, SERENUS
CRESSY, OSB
THE PARABLE OF THE PILGRIM
♫
quarter of a millenium separates
these texts from each other, the first written by an
Augustinian Canon to an anchoress, the second by two
Benedictines to English Benedictine nuns in exile and for
others. The parable of the pilgrim is not unlike the
Russian account of a pilgrim, The Tale of a Pilgrim and its 'Prayer of
Jesus'. I find myself much drawn to it, having written on
pilgrimage in America, having made the literal pilgrimage
to Jerusalem; then, having
discovered and treasured these echoing texts in my former
convent in Sussex, where I was librarian, following that
pilgrimage; next, as a hermit going daily to Mass in the
mountains above Florence, reciting this prayer in the form
of 'I am nought, I have nought, I seek nought, but sweet
Jesus in Jerusalem', 'Sono nessuno, non ho niente, cerco
soltanto il dolce Gesù a Gerusalemme', in the winters in
the dark to the hoots of owls, in the summers to lark and
blackbird song, in the spring and fall to
the dawn chorus, regaining my faith.
Walter
Hilton
(† 1396)
From the
Scale of Perfection Book II.21-23:
[For
manuscript transcription in its original Middle
English, see Walter Hilton, The Parable of a Pilgrim, from The
Scale of Perfection]
21. An
introduction as to how a soul should behave in
purpose and in practise if it wants to come to
this reforming, through the example of a pilgrim
going to Jerusalem; and the two kinds of humility.
evertheless, because you desire to
have some kind of practice by which you could
approach that reforming more quickly, I shall tell
you by the grace of our Lord Jesus what seems to
me the shortest and promptest aid that I know in
this work. And how that shall be I will tell you
in this manner, through the example of a good
pilgrim.
There
was a man wanting to go to Jerusalem, and because
he did not know the way he came to another man who
he thought knew it and asked whether he could
reach that city. The other man told him he could
not get there without great hardship and labour,
for the way is long and the perils are great, with
thieves and robbers as well as many other
difficulties to beset a man on his journey; also
there are many different ways seeming to lead in
that direction, yet people are being killed and
robbed daily and cannot come to the place they
desire. However, there is one way, and he would
undertake that anyone who takes and keeps to it
shall come to the city of Jerusalem, and never
lose his life or be slain or die of want. He would
often be robbed and badly beaten and suffer great
distress on his journey, but his life would always
be safe. Then the pilgrim said: 'If it is true
that I can keep my life and come to the place I
desire, I do not care what trouble I suffer on the
journey, and therefore tell me what you will, and
I promise faithfully to do as you say'. The other
man answered and said this: 'See, I am setting you
on the right road. This is the way, and be sure to
keep the instructions I give you'.
'Whatever
you
hear, see or feel that would hinder you on your
way, do not willingly stay with it, and do not
tarry for it, taking rest; do not look at it, do
not take pleasure in it, and do not fear it; but
always go forth on your way and think that you
want to be in Jerusalem. For that is what you long
for and what you desire, and nothing else but
that; and if men rob you, strip you, beat you,
scorn you and despise you, do not fight back if
you want to have your life, but bear the hurt that
you have and go on as if it were nothing, lest you
come to more harm. In the same way, if men want to
delay you with stories and feed you with lies,
trying to draw you to pleasures and make you leave
your pilgrimage, turn a deaf ear and do not reply,
saying only that you want to be in Jerusalem. And
if men offer you gifts and seek to enrich you with
worldly goods, pay no attention to them, always
think of Jerusalem. And if you will keep on this
way and do as I have said, I promise you your life
- that you shall not be slain but come to the
place that you desire'.
According
to our spiritual propositions, Jerusalem is as
much as to say sight
of peace and stands for contemplation in
perfect love of God, for contemplation is nothing
other than a sight of Jesus, who is true peace.
Then if you long to come to this blessed sight of
true peace and to be a faithful pilgrim toward
Jerusalem - even though it should be that I was
never there, yet as far as I know - I shall set
you in the way that leads toward it.
The
beginning
of the highway along which you shall go is
reforming in faith, grounded humbly in the faith
and in the laws of holy church, as I have said
before, for trust assuredly that although you have
formerly sinned, you are on the right road, if you
are now reformed by the sacrament of penance
according to the law of holy church. Now since you
are on the sure way, if you want to speed on your
travels and make a good journey each day, you
should hold these two things often in your mind -
humility and love. That is: I am nothing; I have
nothing; I desire only one thing. You
shall have the meaning of these words continually
in your intention, and in the habit of your soul,
even though you may not always have their
particular form in your thought, for that is not
necessary. Humility says, I am nothing; I have
nothing. Love says, I desire only one thing, and
that is Jesus. These two strings, well-fastened
with mindfulness of Jesus, make good harmony on
the harp of the soul when they are skillfully
touched with the finger of reason. For the lower
you strike upon the one, the higher sounds the
other; the less you feel that you are or that you
have of yourself through humility, the more you
long to have of Jesus in the desire of love. I do
not mean only that humility that a soul feels as
it looks at its own sin or at the frailties and
wretchedness of this life, or at the worthiness of
his fellow Christians, for although this humility
is true and medicinal, it is comparatively rough
and carnal, not pure or soft or lovely. But I mean
also this humility that the soul feels though
grace in seeing and considering the infinite being
and wonderful goodness of Jesus, and if you cannot
see it yet with your spiritual eye, that you
believe in it, for through the sight of his being
- either in full faith or in feeling - you shall
regard yourself not only as the greatest wretch
that there is, but also as nothing in the
substance of your soul, even if you had never
committed sin. And that is lovely humility, for in
comparison with Jesus who is in truth All, you are
but nothing. In the same way think that you have
nothing, but are like a vessel that always stands
empty, as if with nothing in it of your own for
however many good works you do, outwardly or
inwardly, you have nothing at all until you have -
and feel that you have - the love of Jesus. For
your soul can be filled only with that precious
liquor, and with nothing else; and because that
thing alone is so precious and so valuable, regard
anything you have and do as nothing to rest in,
without the sight and the love of Jesus. Throw it
all behind you and forget it, so that you can have
what is best of all.
Just
as a true pilgrim going to Jerusalem leaves behind
him home and land, wife and children, and makes
himself poor and bare of all that he has in order
to travel light and without hindrance, so if you
want to be a spiritual pilgrim you are to make
yourself naked of all that you have - both good
works and bad - and throw them all behind you, and
thus become so poor in your own feeling that there
can be no deed of your own that you want to lean
upon for rest, but you are always desiring more
grace of love, and always seeking the spiritual
presence of Jesus. If you do so, you shall then
set in your heart, wholly and fully, your desre to
be at Jerusalem, and in no other place but there;
and that is, you shall set in your heart, wholly
and fully, your will to have nothing but the love
of Jesus and the spiritual sight of him, as far as
he wishes to show himself. It is for that alone
you are made and redeemed, and that is your
beginning and your end, your joy and your glory.
Therefore, whatsoever you have, however rich you
may be in other works of body and spirit, unless
you have that, and know and feel that you have it,
consider that you have nothing at all. Print this
statement well on the intention of your heart, and
hold firmly to it, and it will save you from all
the perils of your journey, so that your will
never perish. It shall save you from thieves and
robbers (which is what I call unclean spirits), so
that though they strip you and beat you with
diverse temptations, your life shall always be
saved; and in brief if you guard it as I shall
tell you, you shall within a short time escape all
perils and distresses and come to the city of
Jerusalem.
ow that you are on the road and
know the name of the place you are bound for,
begin to go forward on your journey. Your going
forth is nothing else but the work of the spirit -
and of the body as well, when there is need for it
- which you are to use with discretion in the
following way. Whatever work it is that you should
do, in body or in spirit, according to the degree
and state in which you stand, it if helps this
grace-given desire that you have to love Jesus,
making it more whole, easier and more powerful for
all virtues and all goodness, that is the work I
consider the best, whether it be prayer,
meditation, reading or working; and as long as
that taks most strenghtens your heart and your
working; and as long as that task most strengthens
your heart and you will for the love of Jesus and
draws your affection and your thought farthest
from worldly vanities, it is good to use it. And
if it happens that the savour of it becomes less
through use, and you feel that you savour anothing
kind of work more, and you feel more grace in
another, take another and leave that one. For
though your desire and the yearning of your heat
for Jesus should always be unchangeable,
nevertheless the spiritual practices that you are
to use in prayer or the meditation to feed and
nourish your desire may be diverse, and may well
be changed according to the way you feel disposed
to appply your own heart, through grace.
For
it goes with works and desire as it does with a
fire and sticks. The more sticks are laid on a
fire, the greater is the flame, and so the more
varied the spiritual work that anyone has in mind
for keeping his desire whole, the more powerful
and ardent shall be his desire for God. Therefore
notice carefully what work you best know how to do
and what most helps you to keep whole this desire
for Jesus (if you are free, and are not bound
except under the common law), and do that. Do not
bind yourself unchangeably to practices of your
own choosing that hinder the freedom of your heart
to love Jesus if grace should specially visit you,
for I shall tell you which customs are always good
and need to be kept. See, a particular custom is
always good to keep if it consists in getting
virtue and hindering sin, and that practice should
never be left. For if you behave well, you will
always be humble and patient, sober and chaste;
and so with all other virtues. But the practice of
any other thing that hinders a better work should
be left when it is time for one to do this; for
instance in a certain way for a particular length
of time, or waking or kneeling for a certian time,
or doing other such bodily work, this practice is
to be left off sometimes when a reasonable cause
hinders it, or else if more grace comes from
another quarter.
22.
The delays and temptations that souls shall feel
from their spiritual enemies on their spiritual
journey to the heavenly Jerusalem, and some
remedies against them.
Now
you are on the way and know how you shall go. Now
beware of enemies that will be trying to hinder
you if they can, for their intention is to put out
of your heart that desire and that longing that
you have for the love of Jesus, and to drive you
home again to the love of worldly vanity, for
there is nothing that grieves them so much. These
enemies are principally carnal desires and vain
fears that rise out of your heart through the
corruption of your fleshly nature, and want to
hinder your desire for the love of God, so that
they can fully occupy your heart without
disturbance. These are your nearest enemies. There
are other enemies too, such as unclean spirits
that are busily trying to decieve you with tricks
and wiles. But you shall have one remedy, as I
said before: whatever it may be they say, do not
believe them, but keep on your way and desire only
the love of Jesus. Always give this answer: I am
nothing, I have nothing, I desire nothing but the
love of Jesus alone. If your enemies speak to you
first like this, by stirrings in your heart, that
you have not made a proper confession, or that
there is some old sin hidden in your heart that
you do not know and never confessed, and therefore
you must turn home again, leave your desire and go
to make a better confession: do not believe this
saying, for it is false and you are absolved.
Trust firmly that you are on the road, and you
need no more ransacking of your confession for
what is past: keep on your way and think of
Jerusalem. Similarly, if they say that you are not
worthy to have the love of God, and ask what good
it is to crave something you cannot have and do
not deserve, do not believe them, but go forward,
saying thus, 'Not because I am worthy, but because
I am unworthy - that is my motive for loving God,
for if I had that love, it would make me worthy;
and since I was made for it, even though I should
never have it I will yet desire it, and therefore
I will pray and meditate in order to get it'. And
then, if your enemies see that you begin to grow
bold and resolute in your work, they start getting
frightened of you; however, they will not stop
hindering you when they can as long as your are
going on your way. What with fear and menaces on
the one hand and flattery and false blandishment
on the other, to make you break your purpose and
turn home again, they will speak like this: 'If
you keep up your desire for Jesus, labouring as
hard as you have begun, you will fall into
sickness or into fantasies and frenzies, as you
see some do, or you will fall into poverty and
come to bodily harm, and no one will want to help
you; or you might fall into secret temptations of
the devil, in which you will not know how to help
yourself. It is very dangerous for any man to give
himself wholly to the love of God, to leave all
the world and desire nothing but his love alone;
for so many perils may befall that one does not
know of. And therefore turn home again and leave
this desire, for you will never carry it through
to the end, and behave as other people do in the
world'.
So
say your enemies; but do not believe them. Keep up
your desire, and say nothing else but that you
want to have Jesus and to be in Jerusalem. And if
they then perceive your will to be so strong that
you will not spare yourself - for sin or for
sickness, for fantasies or frenzy, for doubts or
fears of spiritual temptations, for poverty or
distress, for life or for death - but that you
will is set ever onward, with one thing and one
alone, turning a deaf ear to them as if you did
not hear them, and keeping on stubbornly and
unstintingly with your prayers and your other
spiritual works, and with discretion according to
the counsel of your superior or your spiritual
father; then they begin to be angry and to draw a
little nearer to you. They start robbing you and
beating you and doing you all the injury they
know: and that is when they cause all your deeds -
however well done - to be judged evil by others
and turned the worst way. And whatever you may
want to do for the benefit of your body and soul,
it will be hampered and hindered by other men, in
order to thwart you in everything that you
reasonably desire. All this they do to stir you to
anger, resentment or ill-will against your fellow
Christians.
But
against all these annoyances, and all others that
may befall, use this remedy; take Jesus in your
mind, and do not be angry with them; do not linger
with them, but think of your lesson - that you are nothing,
you have nothing, you cannot lose any earthly
goods, and you desire nothing but the love of
Jesus - and keep on your way to Jerusalem,
with your occupation. Nevertheless, if through
your own frailty you are at some time vexed with
such troubles befalling your life in the body
through the ill-will of man or the malice of the
devil, come to yourself again as soon as you can;
stop thinking of that distress and go forth to
your work. Do not stay too long with them, for
fear of your enemies.
23.
A general remedy against wicked stirrings and
painful vexations that befall the heart from the
world, the flesh and the devil.
nd your enemies will be much
abashed, when they see you so well-disposed that
you are not annoyed, heavyhearted, wrathful, or
greatly stirred against any creature, for anything
that they can do or say against you, but that you
fully set your heart upon bearing all that may
happen - ease and hardship, praise or blame - and
that you will not trouble about anything, provided
you can keep whole your thought and your desire
for the love of God. But then they will try you
with flattery and vain blandishment, and that is
when they bring to the sight of your soul all your
good deeds and virtues and impress upon you that
all men praise you and speak of your holiness; and
how everybody loves you and honors you for your
holy living. Your enemies do this to make you
think that their talk is true, and take delight in
this vain joy and rest in it; but if you do well
you shall hold all such vain jabbering as the
falsehood and flattery of your enemy, who proffers
you a drink of venom tempered with honey.
Therefore refuse it; say you do not want any of
it, but want to be in Jerusalem.
You shall feel such hindrances, or others like
them - what with your flesh, the world and the
devil - more than I can recite now. For as long as
a man allows his thoughts to run willingly all
over the world to consider different things, he
notices few hindrances; but as soon as he draws
all his thought and his yearning to one thing
alone - to have that, to see that, to know that,
and to love that (and that is only
Jesus) - then he shall well feel many painful
hindrances, for everything that he feels and is
not what he desires is a hindrance to him.
Therefore, I have told you particularly of some as
an example. Furthermore, I say in general that
whatever stirring you feel from your flesh or from
the devil, pleasant or painful, bitter or sweet,
agreeable or dreadful, glad or sorrowful - that
would draw down your thought and your desire from
the love of Jesus to worldly vanity and utterly
prevent the spiritual desire that you have for the
love of him, so that your heart should stay
occupied with that stirring: think nothing of it,
do not willingly receive it, and do not linger
over it too long. But if it concerns some worldly
thing that ought to be done for yoruself or your
fellow Christian, finish with it quickly and bring
it to an end so that it does not hang on your
heart. If it is some other thing that is not
necessary, or does not concern you, do not trouble
about it, do not parley with it, and do not get
angry; neither fear it nor take pleasure in it,
but promptly strike it out of your heart, saying
thus: 'I am
nothing; I have nothing; I neither seek nor
desire anything but the love of Jesus'.
Knit your thought to this desire and make it
strong; maintain it with prayer and with other
spiritual work so that you do not forget it; and
it shall lead you in the right way and save you
from all perils, so that although you feel them
you shall not perish. And I think it will bring
you to perfect love of our Lord Jesus.
On the other hand I also say: Whatever work or
stirring it may be that can help your desire,
strengthen and nourish it, and make your
heart furthest from the enjoyment and remembrance
of the world, and more whole and more ardent for
the love of God - whether it be prayer or
meditation, stillness or speaking, reading or
listening, solitude or company, walking or sitting
- keep it for the time and work in it as long as
the savor lasts, provided you take with it food,
drink and sleep like a pilgrim, keeping discretion
in your labor as your superior advises and
ordains. For however great his haste on his
journey, yet at the right time he is willing to
eat, drink and sleep. Do so yourself, for although
it may hinder you at one time it shall advance you
at another.
[For manuscript transcription in its original Middle English, see Walter Hilton, The Parable of a Pilgrim, from The Scale of Perfection]
Dom Augustine
Baker (†1638),
Dom Serenus Cressy, OSB (†1674)
'The Parable of the
Pilgrim' in Holy Wisdom, Chapter 6, edited by
Dom Serenus Cressy from Don Augustine Baker's writings,
acknowledges its souce in Walter Hilton's Scala Perfectionis.
Now
for a further confirmation and more
effectual recommendation of what hath
hitherto been delivered touching the
nature of a contemplative life in
general, the superminent nobleness of
its end, the great difficulties to be
expected in it, and the absolute
necessity of a firm courage to persevere
and continually to make progress in it,
whatsoever it costs us (without which
resolution it is in vain to set one step
forward in these ways), I will here
annex a passage extracted out of that
excellent treatise called Scala
Perfectionis, written by that
eminent contemplative, Dr Walter Hilton,
a Carthusian Monk, in which, under the
parable of a devout pilgrim desirous to
travel to Jerusalem (which he interprets
as the vision of peace or
contemplation), he delivers instructions
very proper and efficacious touching the
behaviour requisite in a devout soul for
such a journey; the true sense of which
advice I will take liberty so to deliver
briefly as, notwithstanding, not to omit
any important matter there more largely,
and according to the old fashion,
expressed.
The
pilgrim, overjoyed with that news, answered: 'So
I may have my life safe, at last come to the
place that I above
all only
desire , I care not what miseries I suffer in
the way'.
Now this same humility is to be exercised, not so much in considering thine own self, thy sinfulness and misery (though to do thus at the first be very good and profitable), but rather in a quiet loving sight of the infinite endless being and goodness of Jesus; the which beholdinging of Jesus must be either through grace in a savourous feeling knowledge of hi, or at least in a full and firm faith in Him. And such a beholding, when thou shalt attain to it, will work in thy mind a far more pure, spiritual, solid and perfect humility, than the former way of behlding thyself, the which produces a humility more gross, boisterous and unquiet. By that thou wilt see and feel thyself, not only to be the most wretched filthy creature in the world, but also in the very substance of thy soul (setting aside the foulness of sin) to be a mere nothing, for truly, in and of thyself and in regard to Jesus (who really and in truth is all), thou art a mere nothing; and till thou hast the love of Jesus, yea, and feelest that thou hast His love, although thou hast done to thy seeming never so many good deeds both outward and inward, yet in truth thou hast nothing at all, for nothing will abide in thy soul and fill it but the love of Jesus. Therefore, cast all other things behind thee, and forget them, that thou mayest have that which is best of all; and thus doing, thou wilt beome a true pilgrim that leaves behind him houses, and wife, and children, and friends, and goods, and makes himself poor and bare of all things, that he may go on his journey lightly and merrily without hindrance.
'Well,
now
thou
art
in
thy way travelling towards Jerusalem; the
which travelling consists in working inwardly,
and (when need is) outwardly too, such works
as are suitable to thy condition and state,
and such as will help and increase in thee
this gracious desire that thou hast to love
Jesus only. Let thy works be what they will,
thinking, or reading, or preaching or
labouring, etc.; if thou findest that they
draw thy mind from worldly vanity, and confirm
thy heart and will more to the love of Jesus,
it is good and profitable for thee to use
them. And if thou findest that through custom
such works do in time lose their savour and
virtue to increase this love, and it seems to
thee that thou feelest more grace and
spiritual profit in some other, take these
other and leave those, for though the
inclination and desire of thy heart to Jesus
must ever be unchangeable, nevertheless
thy spiritual works thou shalt use in thy
manner of praying, reading, etc., to the end
to feed and strengthen this desire, may well
be changed, according as thou feelest thyself
by grace disposed in the applying of thy
heart. Bind not thyself, therefore,
unchangeably to voluntary customs, for that
will hinder the freedom of thy heart to love
Jesus, if grace would visit thee specially.
'Before
thou
hast
made
many steps in the way, thou must expect a
world of enemies of several kinds, that will
beset thee round about, and all of them will
endeavour busily to hinder thee from going
forward; yea, and if they can by any means,
they will, either by persuasions, flatteries,
or violence, force thee to return home again
to those vanities that thou hast forsaken. For
there is nothing grieves them so much as to
see a resolute desire in thy heart to love
Jesus, and to travail to find Him. Therefore
they will all conspire to put out of thy heart
that good desire and love in which all virtues
are comprised.
'Thy
first
enemies
that
will assault thee will be fleshly desires and
vain fears of thy corrupt heart; and with
these there will join unclean spirits, that
with sights and temptations will seek to
allure thy heart to them, and to withdraw it
from Jesus. But whatsoever they say, believe
them not; but betake thyself to thy old only
secure remedy, answering ever thus, I am nought, I
have nought, and I desire nought, but only
the love of Jesus, and so hold forth
on thy way desiring Jesus only.
'If
they
endeavour
to
put dreads and scruples into thy mind, and
would make thee belief that thou hast not done
penance enough, as thou oughtest for thy sins,
but that some old sins remain in thy heart not
yet confessed, or not sufficiently confessed
and absolved, and that therefore thou must
needs return home and do penance better before
thou have the boldness to go to Jesus, do not
believe a word of all that they say, for thou
art sufficiently acquitted of thy sins, and
there is no need at all that thou shouldst
stay to ransack thy conscience, for this will
now but do thee harm, and either put thee
quite out of thy way or at least unprofitably
delay thy travailing in it.
'If
they
shall
tell
thee that thou art not worthy to have the love
of Jesus, or to see Jesus, and therefore that
thou oughtest not to be so presumptious to
desire and seek after it, believe them not,
but go on and say: It is not because I am
worthy, but because I am unworthy, that I
therefore desire to have the love of Jesus,
for if once I had it, it would make me worthy.
I will therefore never cease desiring it till
I have obtained it. For, for it only was I
created, therefore, say and do what you will,
I will desire it continually, I will never
cease to pray for it, and so doing I hope to
obtain it.
'If
thou
meetest
with
any that seem friends unto thee, and that in
kindness would stop thy progress by
entertaining thee, and seeking to draw thee to
sensual mirth by vain discourses and carnal
solaces, whereby thou wilt be in danger to
forget thy pilgrimage, give a deaf ear to
them, answer them not; think only on this, That thou
wouldest fain be at Jerusalem. And if
they proffer thee gifts and preferments, heed
them not, but think ever on Jerusalem.
'And
if
men
despise
thee, or lay any false calumnies to thy
charge, giving thee ill names; if they go
about to defraud thee or rob thee; yea, if
they beat thee and use thee despitefully and
cruelly, for thy life content not with them,
strive not against them, nor be angry with
them, but content thyself with the harm
received, and go on quietly as if nought were
done, that thou take no further harm; think
only on this, that to be at Jerusalem deserves
to be purchased with all this ill-usage or
more, and that there thou shalt be
sufficiently repaired for all thy losses, and
recompensed for all hard usages by the way.
'If
thine
enemies
see
that thou growest courageous and bold, and
that thou will neither be seduced by
flatteries nor disheartened with the pains and
troubles of thy journey, but rather well
contented with them, then they will begin to
be afraid of thee; yet for all that, they will
never cease pursuing thee - they will follow
thee all along the way, watching all
advantages against thee, and ever and anon
they will set upon thee, seeking either with
flatteries or frights to stop thee, and drive
thee back if they can. But fear them not; hold
on thy way, and have nothing in thy mind but
Jerusalem and Jesus, whom thou wilt find
there.
'If
thy
desire
of
Jesus still continues and grows more strong,
so that it makes thee to go on thy ways
courageously, they will then tell thee that it
may very well happen that thou wilt fall into
corporal sickness, and perhaps such a sickness
as will bring strange fancies into thy mind,
and melancholic apprehensions; or perhaps thou
wilt fall into great want, and no man will
offer to help thee, by occasion of which
misfortunes thou wilt be grievously tempted by
thy ghostly enemies, the which will then
insult over thee, and tell thee that thy folly
and proud presumption have brought thee to
this miserable pass, that thou canst neither
help thyself, nor will any man help thee, but
rather hinder those that would. And all this
they will do to the end to increase thy
melancholic and unquiet apprehensions, or to
provoke thee to anger or malice against thy
Christian brethren, or to murmur against
Jesus, who, perhaps for thy trial, seems to
hide His face from thee. But still neglect all
these suggestions as though thou heardest them
not. Be angry with nobody but thyself. And as
for all thy diseases, poverty, and whatsoever
other sufferings (for who can reckon all that
may befall thee?), take Jesus in thy mind,
think on this lesson that thou art taught, and
say, I am
nought, I have nought, I care for nought in
this world, and I desire nought but the love
of Jesus, that I may see him in peace in
Jerusalem.
'But
if
it
shall
happen sometimes, as likely it will, that
through some of these temptations and thy own
frailty, thou stumble and perhaps fall down,
and get some harm thereby, or that thou for
some time be turned a little out of the right
way, as soon as possibly may be come again to
thyself, get up again and return into the
right way, using such remedies for thy hurt as
as the Church ordains; and do not trouble
thyself over much or over long with thinking
unquietly on thy past misfortune and pain -
abide not in such thoughts, for that will do
thee more harm, and give advantage to thine
enemies. Therefore, make haste to go on in thy
travail and working again, as if nothing had
happened. Keep but Jesus in thy mind, and a
desire to gain his love, and nothing shall be
able to hurt thee.
'At
last,
when
thine
enemies perceive that thy will to Jesus is so
strong that thou wilt not spare neither for
poverty nor mischief, for sickness nor
fancies, or doubts nor fears, or life nor
death, no, nor for sins neither, but ever
forth thou wilt go on with that one thing of
seeking the love of Jesus, and with nothing
else; and that thou despisest and scarce
markest anything that they say to the
contrary, but holdest on in thy praying and
other spiritual works (yet always with
discretion and submission), then they grow
even enraged, and will spare no manner of most
cruel usage. They will come closer to thee
than ever before, and betake themselves to
their last and most dangerous assault, and
that is, to bring into the sight of thy mind
all thy good deeds and virtues, showing thee
that all men praise thee, and love thee, and
bear thee great veneration for thy sanctity,
etc. And all this they do to the end to raise
vain joy and pride in thy heart. But if thou
tenderest thy life, thou wilt hold all this
flattery and falsehood to be a deadly poison
to thy soul, mingled with honey; therefore,
away with it; caste it from thee, saying, thou
wilt have none of it, but thou wouldest be at
Jerusalem,
'And
to
the
end,
to put thyself out of the danger and reach of
all such temptations, suffer not thy thoughts
willingly to run about the world, but draw
them all inwards, fixing them upon one only
thing, which is Jesus; set thyself to think
only on Him, to know Him, to love Him; and
after thou hast for a good time brought
thyself to do thus, then whatsoever thou seest
or feelest inwardly that is not He, will be
unwelcome and painful to thee, because it will
stand in thy way to the seeing and seeking of
Him whom thou only desirest.
'But
yet,
if
there
be any work or outward business which thou art
obliged to do, or that charity or present
necessity requires of thee, either concerning
thyself or thy Christian brother, fail not to
do it: despatch it as well and as soon as well
thou canst, and let it not tarry long in thy
thoughts, for it will but hinder thee in thy
principal business. But if it be any other
matter of no necessity, or that concerns thee
not in particular, trouble not thyself nor
distract thy thoughts about it, but rid it
quickly out of thy heart, saying still thus, I am nought, I
can do nought, I have nought, and nought do
I desire to have, but only Jesus and his
love.
'Thou
wilt
be
forced,
as all other pilgrims are, to take ofttimes,
by the way, refreshments, meats and drink and
sleep, yea, and sometimes innocent
recreations; in all which things use
discretion, and take heed of a foolish
scrupulosity about them. Fear not that they
will be much a hindrance to thee, for though
they seem to stay thee for a while, they will
further thee and give thee strength to walk on
more courageously for a good long time after.
'To
conclude,
remember
that
thy principal aims, and indeed only business,
is to knit thy thoughts to the desire of Jesus -
to strengthen this desire daily by prayer and
other spiritual workings, to the end it may
never go out of thy heart. And whatsoever thou
findest proper to increase that desire, be it
praying or reading, speaking or being silent,
travailing or reposing, make use of it for the
time, as long as thy soul finds savour in it,
and as long as it increases this desire of
having or enjoying nothing but the love of Jesus, and the blessed sight of Jesus in true peace in Jerusalem;
and be assured that this good desire thus
cherished and continually increased will bring
thee safe unto the end of thy pilgrimage'.
This
is
the
substance
of the parable of the Spiritual Pilgrim
travailing in the ways of contemplation; the
which I have more largely set down because,
but the contexture of it, not only we see
confirmed what is already written before, but
also we have a draught and scheme represented,
according to which all the following
instructions will be conformably answerable.
Bibliography
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Direction for the Prayer of Contemplation.
The Digest made by Fr Serenus Cressy, from
the Treatises of Fr Baker, First Published
under the Title, Sancta Sophia in 1657.
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